HomeOpinion & AnalysisLetter to my people: The terrible optics from trip of shame

Letter to my people: The terrible optics from trip of shame

BY DOCTOR STOP IT

MY DEAR PEOPLE

There is never a dull day in Zimbabwe, it seems.

Just to get this out of the way; it seems the Page 2 girl threw her toys out of the pram again in the past week and had the editors cowering.

In the past, I have mentioned that the Page 2 girl can literally be anything she wants, from a counsellor to a bus driver.

Now she seems to have added the title of “editor” to what is clearly a long CV.

I was not there, but I can imagine the rant she threw when The Herald did not put the headline she wanted.

As a person who went to university and has a PhD, by the way, I know the media operates with limited space and time.

So the editors at The Herald came up with a headline that said “Colleges endorse first lady’s programme”.

Seems alright, you would think. But not for the Page 2 girl.

The Herald editor had to issue an apology, saying the correct headline should have been “Universities, colleges and vocational training centres endorse first lady’s programme”.

Let’s just call her the editor in chief of all newspapers in this country, kkk.

I wasn’t this bad, was I?

‘Chairman’

So Launchmore went to Scotland to discuss climate change, but the optics were bad from the get go.

At a time when the world is discussing reducing carbon emissions, Launchmore ironically charters a plane from Azerbaijan to transport him and his pals to Glasgow, only him and his hangers on did not see the irony of this.

Already, this seems like hypocrisy on his part.

I am not going to compare him with Baba, but does anyone remember a thing that Launchmore said at the function.

About 11 years ago, Baba addressed the Earth Summit and to this day, people still remember the punchline “Blair keep your England and let me keep my Zimbabwe”.

The likes of Brother Nujoma were on their feet in adulation of Baba’s oratory skills and forthrightness.

But does anyone remember what Launchmore said except that he addressed empty chairs.

If I was a little naughty, I would call him Chairman, but I am not naughty, kkk.

Speaking of embarrassing, the pictures of those people carrying so much alcohol preparing for the arrival of the Chairman, sorry I mean Launchmore, make for terrible optics.

The pair may have been based in Scotland, but spending so much on alcohol, when half the country lives in dire poverty does not make for good reading.

Instead of going to Scotland to make important points on climate change, Launchmore seemed to be keen on scoring brownie points as if he wanted to prove something.

Unfortunately, this trip did more harm to his reputation than  enhance it.

The picture of people buying copious amounts of alcohol, waiting for his arrival, presents a leader who is tone deaf, who doesn’t understand that his people are suffering.

Launchmore hires an expensive jet and his supporters buy expensive whisky, while Zimbabweans are wallowing in hunger.

Remember Mary Antoinette and the French Revolution.

Zanu PF took their little guerilla act to Scotland, where they gave unsuspecting people T-shirts and scarfs and made them chant Zanu PF slogans.

Remember the “kune maT-shirt atichakupai” chant of 2018, it looks like it has gone international and has been exported to Scotland.

This tactic was rudely exposed by Maggie Chapman, a Scottish legislator, who famously took an oath in Shona.

A gushing Ndavaningi used a picture of Chapman adorning the scarf for his own propaganda purposes, but it backfired badly.

Chapman immediately dissociated herself from the Zanu PF regime and said she doesn’t endorse the party.

Ouch, Ndavaningi’s propaganda once again fell flat. That man is terribly out of his depth. It hurts.

Oh and then Ndavaningi tells us that Prince William asked Launchmore to organise a meeting for the royal and Marvellous Nakamba, the Zimbabwean international and Aston Villa player.

The only problem is that Prince William and Nakamba have met before and there is no need for anyone to organise such a meeting.

For someone who lived in England, Ndavaningi should know the links between Villa and Prince William.

But not our Ndavaningi, who seems to be as dull as a door knob. Prince William is a Villa fan and he is known to turn up at their training sessions and some of their matches.

My dear people, if sanctions don’t fall now, then they will never fall.

We all saw Launchmore with Boris, we saw  him close to Biden and other western leaders. This was the chance for him to campaign against sanctions directly.

Coming back to Zimbabwe to hold airport rallies and marches is pointless, as he had a direct chance to address those that imposed sanctions.

By the way, what was the purpose of taking priests to a climate change meeting?

Baba had his excesses, but he had nothing on Chairman.

Stop It!!!!!!

Munopengaaaaaaa

Dr Amai Stop it! PhD (FAKE)

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